“the FLASH”


“joseph and the amazing technicolor dreamcoat” 1995. i was 15. it was my first “real” theatre experience. i was in the chorus and had a bit role as a goat. yes, you read that right, i was a goat. so the story goes: because of their jealousy, joseph’s brothers sell joseph into slavery, keeping his coat. in order to convince their father that he died (which is what they told him, obviously they weren’t going to admit to selling his favorite son off as a slave, and they killed a goat and covered his coat with the blood. so i got to be the sacrificial goat. woooo hoooo, right? so as joseph was led off stage, i trotted out in my goat costume. now. about my costume. it had 3 parts. part one: red long johns with sewn on veins and bones, yes, seriously. part two: a long, hairy coat with velcro closures on the front. part three: a headpiece with hair and horns. back  to the story. i’m on stage, and two brothers “attack” me which consists of them grabbing my shoulders and ripping the coat off of me, leaving me in the red long johns. easy, right? and it went swimmingly every time we practiced, you know except for the embarrassment of being on stage and getting “stripped” by two older boys when you are 15… one of whom you have a terrible crush on, but you know, it happens.

anyways, the night of the final dress rehearsal the reviewer from the local paper came to see and review the show. everyone was pretty excited/nervous . i was getting ready, which included getting dress in a huge communal rooms with guys and girls everywhere. cause, you know, this doesn’t make being 15 any less awkward. as i’m getting  dressed i’m getting some comments (from the girls, of course) on my new bra and panty set from victoria’s secret. it was satin teal and i LOVED it. now, i was as  flat as flat could be. i mean my size was 32a. it might have been the only “set” i had, we weren’t well off, so trust me, this was a BIG deal.

show time! the performance started off well. everything was great – joseph gave me a thumbs up as he was lead off stage as a slave and i trotted out. i was super cute, many people made sure to tell me before the show started. as i went on stage, c and t (the boys who were in charge of ripping off the hairy coat) gave me a wink as they grabbed me and spun me around – aka “caught” me. well. you knew it was coming, right? they ripped the coat off of me. just as rehearsed about 10 times. only this time, somehow THE VELCRO CAUGHT ONTO THE RED LONG JOHNS and OFF they came!!! suddenly, i’m standing on stage in my teal bra and underwear set, shoes and head-dress. in front of a smallish (about 60 person) audience, reviewer, and even worse, everyone in the cast.

the FLASH was born.


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